As I was reading through the news sites tonight I came across an article that was about a woman who had been on the......well....uh....ummm....OK the toilet for 2 years. Yes you read that right 2 years. Now since I am dedicated to only posting on things that I know are true I found this incident posted at The Associated Press, Yahoo, MSNBC and FoxNews. Well all I can say is, it must have been a slow news day.
Now I am going to point out a few quotes from the articles that I found quite funny, not that this whole incident isn't a knee slapper.
Quote 1: "We pried the toilet seat off with a pry bar and the seat went with her to the hospital," Whipple said. "The hospital removed it." Well that's comforting to know. Kinda' sick but still if you've been on the toilet for two years I sure you get quite attached to things.
Quote 2: "She was not glued. She was not tied. She was just physically stuck by her body," Whipple said. "It is hard to imagine. ... I still have a hard time imagining it myself." Well now there's a new one, stuck to the toilet. I guess...no let me rephrase that...I know when Mr. Whipple (how ironic Charmin had a Mr. Whipple) says he had a hard time imagining this, I bet! I can honestly say that I would never imagine this incident, not in a million years.
Quote 3: "And her reply would be, `Maybe tomorrow,"' Whipple said. "According to him, she did not want to leave the bathroom." This was the boyfriends comment when he would ask the lady who got stuck if she wanted to get up off the toilet. The thing I got a kick out of is that this was an acceptable answer. I'm sorry if you want to use the bathroom.......for 2 years....GO HOME! I sure hope this guy had more than one bathroom. Could you imagine? He would go down to the Piggly Wiggly and ask day after day if he could use their bathroom.....for 2 years.
Quote 4: "She said that she didn't need any help, that she was OK and did not want to leave," he said. Once again....this was acceptable? Help!?! She needs a lot of help, although needing fiber would not be one of those helps.
Quote 5: "It really doesn't surprise me," Ellis said of the bathroom incident. "What surprises me is somebody wasn't called in a bit earlier." OK, this is hilarious. This is a quote from the neighbor and he said that this does not surprise him? What in the Wide World of Sports? What kind of neighborhood is this? Then he comes back with the "No duh" comment of the year when he IS surprised that someone didn't call sooner.
Well hopefully none of you run into this problem.....oh did I say run?
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